The end of 2024 also marks the conclusion of one of the longest and most contentious high-profile divorces in recent memory. Lawyers for Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt have announced that the pair have finally reached a divorce settlement after eight years of legal wrangling.
Jolie and Pitt have undoubtedly learned many difficult life lessons from their lengthy ordeal. But what about the rest of us? Here are some teachable moments from their split to help divorcing spouses—famous or not—prevent their own proceedings from grinding to a standstill.
1. Prioritize the Well-Being of Children
What Happened: Jolie filed for divorce in September 2016, citing irreconcilable differences and seeking sole physical custody of their six children. Pitt responded by requesting joint custody, sparking a prolonged custody battle fueled by allegations of abuse and concerns about parental alienation. It wasn’t until 2021 that the court finalized a custody arrangement.
Lesson: In New Jersey, family law favors maintaining relationships between children and both parents. Sole custody is rare unless there are extenuating factors like abuse, domestic violence, or substance abuse. When such factors are present, thorough documentation—including dates, times, and detailed descriptions of incidents—is essential. This helps judges make informed decisions that prioritize children’s safety and well-being.
2. Avoid Lengthy Court Battles
What Happened: As the years passed after the divorce filing in 2016, the Pitt-Jolie divorce became bogged down as lengthy disputes were waged in the courts over virtually all aspects of their divorce settlement.
Lesson: In New Jersey, the typical timeline for a divorce, from filing to settlement, is about one year. The biggest culprit for divorces that stretch out well beyond this timeline? Lengthy court battles. Litigating a divorce in court can take more time — and add emotional and financial costs too. Going to court is sometimes appropriate, but it’s also true that most divorces can be settled efficiently out of court, even when complex issues are in play and/or there are disagreements. Mediation, arbitration or collaborative divorce are common out-of-court settlement methods.
Tip: To save time, couples can use mediation in conjunction with litigation. Issues with potential for agreement can be resolved by mediating, leaving only the most contentious matters for the judge. Switching from court to mediation is possible at any point before judgment.
3. Separate Emotions from Financial Decisions
What Happened: The successful Château Miraval wine business, co-owned by Pitt and Jolie, became a highly contentious marital asset to divide, with accusations of vindictiveness from both sides. Ultimately, the issue of the wine business was set aside to finalize after the divorce became final.
Lesson: Treat financial decisions during divorce as business transactions rather than opportunities to punish each other. A practical, fairness-focused approach avoids unnecessary disputes and helps protect your financial future. Depending on the asset’s complexity, consulting a financial planner or business valuator can help. Therapy can also provide emotional support during challenging negotiations.
4. NDAs and Social Media Gag Orders Offer Reputation Protection
What Happened: Both Pitt and Jolie accused each other of breaching agreements and airing grievances publicly.
Lesson: Confidentiality during divorce proceedings can reduce conflict and protect reputations. In the age of social media, even non-celebrity couples can put their relationship’s dirty laundry out for public consumption, potentially affecting each other’s standing among friends, family, coworkers, and even their children’s teachers. Non-disclosure or non-disparagement agreements are increasingly common, setting boundaries on what can be shared online, including dos and don’ts for social media posting. Keeping divorce matters private allows for cooler heads to prevail.
5. Find “Quick Wins” to Build Momentum
What Happened: Jolie and Pitt’s divorce appears to have become mired down when it became clear they were fighting high-conflict battles on all fronts, from custody to assets and property to business investments.
Lesson: Identifying and agreeing on “quick wins” during mediation can create momentum for resolving larger disputes. For example, early agreements on smaller assets or parenting time schedules can foster goodwill and a collaborative tone, paving the way for smoother negotiations on more contentious matters.
Tip: Review key issues like custody, asset division, and support agreements before mediation. Identifying areas of potential alignment can reduce the emotional and financial toll of prolonged negotiations.
6. Seek Professional Support
What Happened: Jolie and Pitt’s divorce required the couple to assemble a team of legal professionals, including attorneys, financial experts, and therapists, to help them finally find a path to resolving their divorce.
Lesson: Divorce is a complex and emotionally taxing process. Engaging experienced professionals can provide invaluable guidance to help you navigate key legal challenges, manage emotions, and build a roadmap for your future. Therapists, in particular, can support you through grief, stress, and decision-making struggles.
Tip: Don’t hesitate to seek financial experts if your case involves business ownership, investments, or other intricate assets. Their insights can simplify decision-making and protect your long-term interests.
7. Avoid Using Divorce as a Battleground
What Happened: Throughout their divorce, Pitt and Jolie made accusations against each other that fueled conflict and turned the divorce into an all-out war. Spiraling conflict ultimately prolonged their legal battle and created additional stress for their family.
Lesson: Divorce isn’t about “winning” or “losing.” Viewing it as a battleground can lead to endless disputes, increased costs, and emotional harm. Instead, focus on common ground, “win/win” moments, and practical solutions that pave the way for a healthier post-divorce relationship, especially if you have children.
Tip: Consider using divorce coaching to reframe your mindset and prioritize constructive resolutions. Coaches help you focus on practical outcomes, reduce conflict, and minimize the emotional toll of the process.
8. Keep The Legal Details of Your Divorce Private
What Happened: The Jolie-Pitt divorce made headlines for years, with intimate details of their family life and finances exposed through court filings and media leaks.
Lesson: Out-of-court settlement methods like arbitration, mediation, or collaborative divorce provide more privacy than traditional litigation. Arbitration, for example, is a legally binding process conducted in a private setting, shielding sensitive matters from public records.
Tip: Opting for these methods not only protects your privacy but also reduces stress and keeps the focus on resolving disputes discreetly and efficiently.
These lessons from Jolie and Pitt’s high-profile divorce remind us that even in the most contentious cases, there are strategies to make the process smoother and less damaging for all involved.
Making the decision to divorce? Start safeguarding your future today by scheduling an initial attorney consultation with one of our skilled divorce specialists. Get answers to all your questions, and a clear strategy for moving forward. Call us at 888-888-0919, or please click the green button below.
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